Expansion #2

I got 90cc's today. Whoooo Hooooo I am growing :) I also got the dreaded second drain out. Yep been a good day. Last few days have been bad days because the antibiotics the last month have given me issues and I probably dehydrated some. I am feeling better though and will go back in 10 days for the third expansion. I am a little sore today and probably will be for a few since we expanded more. Now to get rid of the elastic band hopefully next time :)

Checking in...

Today has been an ok day. I get to keep my drain until Monday :( Not happy about it but would rather it stay and finish it's job than take it out and have major problems. I have Lydia this week and that helps alot in some ways. I love this baby more than life it's self. I am having to be careful that I don't pick her up or over extend but so far she has been good about helping me do it without problems. So far we have had a wonderful time :)
My heart has been heavy for a few days now. Two people I love so much are hurting and all I can do is put it in God's hands and pray. I know that with God all things are possible and He can do anything. I know He has a plan... I just pray all parties hear what He has to say.
Keep the prayers coming please... for me and the reconstruction and for my unspoken. Thanks and love to you all...

Expansion #1

I had a really good visit with the surgeon today. I was a little disappointed that my drain has to stay until Monday but I would rather be safe than sorry later.
So what is expansion and what do you need to know? When I had surgery they put in an expander that has saline injected every 10 days or so. They explained each step to me and until I had it done, it sounded really painful. They use a small device and locate my port. This is similar to the one I had chemo with but is part of the expander. He then numbed the area and inserted the needle. I was told to expect a pinch when it hit muscle. I felt the pinch but I have had mosquito bites that hurt worse. Then the doctor will start injecting 10cc's at a time and you have to tell him when it starts to tighten. I got to 50cc's when I felt it. He said he really wanted to try for 60cc's so I told him to go for it. Since it felt the same he was able to give me all 70cc's.  They told me I would be sore tonight and tomorrow and then it gets better each day. I still have the band around my chest and will for 6 weeks. This keeps everything pushed down so I do not have a boob on my shoulder. Seriously, perky boobs are great at my age but not THAT perky....just saying LOL.
Thanks for all the prayers and please keep them coming. This is new territory for me and can be a little scary at times. I am just thankful I have a God who listens and walks with me each step. I pray this blog answers questions for anyone who needs them. Please feel free to leave me a comment or email if I can help you with your journey. Love and thanks to you all.

Almost 2 weeks :)

Tomorrow will be my 2 week mark and I am thankful. Hopefully last drain will come out but I am not sure it will. At least I know it will eventually :) . I will also get to drive again and I am so happy about that. It is tough being dependant on someone to drive you around. I have sympathy for people who can't drive for various reasons. I have had good days and bad days but each is 1 day closer to the end. I want to sleep alot on the days that I have alot to do. My body lets me know when too much is too much. Praise the Lord we finally got Andrew registered and all his fall classes set. I love the staff at Huntingdon College. They are AWESOME! Tonight I am actually cooking dinner. Meatloaf, saffron rice, salad and biscuits. Wayne will be so happy...LOL. Bless that man. He has eaten everything set in front of him on the nights he has worked :)
Emily sent me this awesome site http://www.facebook.com/#!/pages/The-SCAR-Project/255064983743 and it shows alot of what people go through with masectomies. These young women are an inspiration.  Here is the main link http://www.thescarproject.org/ . I agree - Breast Cancer is more than a pink ribbon!!!!
More tomorrow after I see my awesome surgeon :)

Emotions

When you hear the big "C" word you have so many emotions. Fear, sadness, confusion and any other emotion you can think of. With me it was terror and my main concern was get the cancer out of my body and then we would deal with the after effects later. That is where I am today. It has not been an easy journey but one I am glad I took because it has made me the person I am today. The main thing is my relationship with God. I have always loved God but was always the type person who tried to solve everything on my own and not ask for His guidance. I am closer to Him today and I know that whatever happens He is always there even when it doesn't feel like it sometimes. I know this because He promises to never leave nor forsake me. I am not saying everything in my life is great but I know if I seek His plans for me I am where I need to be.
I also have different priorities. My family means the world to me and I have the most awesome husband, son, daughter, son-in-law and granddaughter I could ever be blessed with. My extended family is pretty great too. Then there is my family of chritian believers. How can I be more blessed than that?
It has taken me a long time to get where I am but I think I have grown alot in the last 5 years. In the past year with lots of prayers I know who I am... I am Betty and she has so many facets. Heir to the throne, wife, mother, grandmother, daughter, sister and friend among a few. I am not a mistake, no one's tragedy and here because God put me here. I am loved. I am blessed. I am God's child. Even when people hurt  me or let me down I know He will not.
Why am I telling you this? Because most people who have masectomy's and cancer treatment have low self-esteem sometimes. They no longer feel whole. Some people feel none of this. This is where reconstruction becomes a personal choice. For me it is finishing this chapter of my life so that a new one begins. I thank my friend Joyce for helping me realize this. I struggled with how to explain it and she helped put in prospective.
Today has been a decent day and I go back next week to have 2nd drain removed and injection. Yes it is painful but prayer sure does help ease it :)

Post-Op Visit

My trip to the surgeon was interesting. Andrew and my adopted child Will Butt took me. Put these 2 together and they will entertain you! Needless to say it was not boring going or coming back. Just don't let them have energy drinks!
Today went really well with the surgeon. I was able to have 1 drain removed and hopefully the other on the 17th if not sooner. The best part is that he said I could take a shower!! Yeah and it isn't even Saturday :) The weekend was kinda tough with yesterday being the worse day. I still hurt but not as much as I did. When I go back I will have my 1st expansion since surgery so it seems like this will be a biweekly thing for awhile. Just as long as he stops before I look like Dolly will be ok...LOL I want to thank everyone for the prayers. God has blessed us richly with friends and family who aren't afraid to lift others in prayer and we are so grateful for them.
Andrew is cooking dinner tonight. Chicken tenders, mac and cheese and califlower. Ice Cream for desert :). Sure it's pre-cooked tenders, boxed mac and cheese and steam in bag califlower but it will be awesome. Love always makes any food taste better. I am just blessed I have a son who will try to cook :) I sure do love my kids and granddaughter!
Well it has been a tiring and busy day so it's time for this lady to rest. Love and thanks to you all!

Day 3

Today has been a good day so far. The pain is manageable and I actually got a bath and Wayne washed my hair for me. That in itself made me feel so much better. Now that I am more aware of my surroundings I will explain what has happened so far. When I had surgery that put in saline expanders and a mesh material to hold them in place. I will have drainage tubes for a few weeks and on antibiotics. This website will explain alot of what is done and is going to be done: http://www.breastreconstruction.ca/implant.htm The hospital staff was so good to me and I am thankful for all they did.
Wayne has been chief cook and bottle-washer so far and is doing a good job taking care of me. He has a boston butt cooking right now and it smells awesome. I sure do love this man! God has blessed me beyond anything I can imagine.

home...

I made it home last night and was so glad to be here. Surgery went fine but man am I sore!! My first thoughts when I woke up was oh no what did I do?!?!?? I will not lie to you... having expanders put in hurts! Thank goodness for pain medications. I had a few problems with my blood sugar spiking but other than that it went as to be expected. I go back Monday to the doctor. What to expect if you have this done:
1. You cannot come home and be Wonder Woman. You will be lucky if you feel like Smurfette.
2. Make sure you have help because the first couple of days you will need it.
3. Follow doctors order and take your meds. Don't try to tough it out.... you will loose.
4. Sleep when you can.
5. Walk around some if you can.

Thanks for all the love and prayers that have been sent our way. They have been the best medicine possible. More to follow as I gather my thoughs and the fog clears....