A new year has begun and the journey continues. There are some days I long to go home but I know God still has a plan. That just makes Satan work harder to get to me. For the last several months I have been so angry and it is because PMS has returned. It is hard not having to deal with it for over 5 years and then it comes back with a vengence. If Tyler Perry needed new material I could supply him with a new movie... Diary of a Mad White Woman. That is how hormonal imbalance feels... angry and sad at times because you can't control how you feel sometimes. I am tired of the hot flashes and night sweats. Hopefully with the D&C Friday we will have some answers since the biopsy didn't. We were unable to get past the cervix but on a good note all is fine up to there.
The rest of my reconstruction is set to take place the 24th of this month. I am ready to get past that also. I am not looking forward to the down time but I chose to do this and I believe I will feel more complete when I am done. It will feel a little like getting back some of what cancer took away. Sometimes I feel that is vanity speaking but somehow I feel it is what I need for me and no one else.
On a happy note, we spent Christmas with our kids and grandbabies. Emily went to the hospital and stayed a few days. She got a PICC line and is doing so much better. She even feels "Baby Cheeto" flutter around. We should know if "Cheeto" is a boy or girl next month. I am excited for either. We all spent Christmas together and it was great.
When we came home my Mom went to the hospital for 8 days with pancreatitis but came home this past weekend and is doing better. I am so glad she is better because my Dad went home 26 years ago on the 6th and that is a tough day. With everything I have going emotionally, having Mom in the hospital brought back all the saddness. It is easier now because on the 4th we get to celebrate Lydia's birthday. She was 4 this year and is such a joy to us. I also know I will see my Dad one day. Wayne and I also got colds for Christmas and after 3 weeks are finally feeling better.
As you can see, there have been alot of trials since I began my journey. When you try to let God lead you, Satan tries to detour you. I am so thankful that if I get off track God puts me in front of the right way to go. So until my next post I will continue to praise Him no matter what happens. Love to you all....
I Love You!
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